I am an athlete on the inside and a fat girl on the outside. I set a crazy goal to run a half marathon last year. I finished it swearing I would never run another step the rest of my life - I lied.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Stupid Scale
Today I got on the scale for a first time in a long time. I know I've been slacking in my exercise, and performing like a professional eater as far as my diet is concerned. So, I've been avoiding it.
I make some good choices throughout the day and then reward myself with some cake later.
That doesn't seem to be working for me :(
Today was the initial weigh-in for another round of the Facebook Biggest Loser Competition. (Here's a link to my experience when I was part of the group last year.) I wanted to join up again to get back in shape. Clearly I'm motivated by shopping. And the prize at the end of 12 weeks is a bright shiny gift card. So that was incentive enough for me to face the music and hop on the scale this morning.
Then I sat around for two hours wondering what the heck just happened.
You would think a person could see a monumental weight gain like that coming. But, I chose to ignore the signs of shrinking jeans (darn dryer), boots that took a little longer to zip up (must've gotten the leather wet or something), and my daughter's comments of "Mom! The Wii Fit Guy is asking about you again" (he just really likes me). Thusly, this morning, I was blind-sided by the numbers staring back at me.
It took me two hours before I could upload that stupid photo from the stupid scale. I didn't want to do it. I thought I would just lose the weight again quietly, by myself, and then join the next round. But I knew that would just be another bad choice. So, after a significant amount of time bargaining with myself, I sucked it up and posted the stupid photo from the stupid scale.
This group of people is so supportive and I should've known I would get nothing but love from them. But once it was done I didn't want to partake in the conversation. I just cried. All that hard work I did last year was almost completely undone by the last four months of complacency. I would like to blame it on my stupid scale or the cake. But the blame rests solely in my choices each day.
The good news is, I've made great choices this morning. And I've been loading up on some fabulous organic products in preparation for the challenge. I will share some of my favs with you at the end of the week.
Now I'm gonna go dry my eyes, drink a spinach smoothie, and go for a run.
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Kelly we are going to work on this together....I think we can support each other and help each other make better choices. FYI: I hated my scale this morning too. :(
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lisa! At least we have the hate part of the love/hate scale relationship out of the way. It'll be all about the love next week :)
ReplyDeleteOh Kelly, I'm right with you today. Dammit, I hate it when that unconscious eating creeps up. I'm proud of you for facing the Dreaded Scale and buying good food and going for a run. WE LOVE YOU.
ReplyDeleteHey - you are brave enough to step on a scale! If I ever do NOBODY gets to know what that number looking at me is. I procrastinate on going to the doctor just because I don't want to be weighed. Forget about eating. If a doctor appointment is near I will rather starve than risk any extra weight going in. I'd rather just not be weighed. :(
ReplyDeleteGP - Thanks for the encouragement. I know you get it. Thanks for keeping it real over on your blog too.
ReplyDeleteRR - I hear ya. That scale can totally suck. But when I don't face it, things like *this* happen. So I will have to continue to face my nemesis.